Memoirs written in prose of Sergeant Robertson, Damon M. USMC while in Iraq | ...with frequent appearances of King Hammurabi.
If you are new to this journal, make sure to start reading in chronological order by scrolling down to the bottom of the oldest post in October 2004. Damon's letters from August 20th, 2004 - October 23rd, 2004 were all added to this blog on Oct. 23rd, 2004. All subsequent letters are posted in real time.
Saturday, October 23, 2004
Dear Family and Friends: It's thursday, 16th of September here. We're 11 hours ahead of you (makes calling anyone a bit difficult, at least on your end of things... you couldn't call me and disturb my sleep if you wanted to). For those of you inquiring after an address, read my lips Something Fishy IS Going On. Units never wait this long to get an address. We are. We don't know why. Last activation I had addresses pouring out of my pockets. Now we don't hear squat. No one knows why, or at least if they know, they're not telling. I'm inclined to think that it's all the outcome of ineptitude on behalf of the staff, but most of them seem like straight shooters, so who knows... A little story: Did you know that Camel Spiders, besides growing as large as a dinner plate, have what is referred to as Hemotoxin venom? Hemotoxin is a digestive enzime/bacteria/something that necrifies (kills) the flesh it's injected into. The spiders get their names because they're traditional prey is, you guessed it, the Camel. They jump up on the belly of the camel and bite them there. Just wait. This gets more disgusting. (sorry Wolphin) ...(she hates spiders, y'all) The females of the species lay their eggs in the newly necrofying flesh. As it rots on the living body (be it camel or otherwise), the larvae eat their fill of it... Anyway. How does the spider get on the belly of the camel, you ask? Oh. They jump. .... Whatever God was thinking when he made a spider that large an acrobat is ANYONE'S guess. I bet they can walk on water, too. Why not? It would only be more terrifying if they could fly I suppose. Furthermore, their legs secrete a topical anesthetic: numbs the skin so you can't feel them crawling all up on your junk. Yeah. They like to "hang out" in the porta-johns. Them and scorpions (who knew?) Their mouths... anyone seen Predator, where Gov. Arnie faces the beast and says "you're one ugly mother ****"? The mouth of a camel spider is the same. Opens four ways. SO DISGUSTING. Stand up. Shake yourselves off. The imaginary camel spider you feel can't hurt you. I killed a tiny one in the barracks last night. "Executed with extreme prejudice" is the terminology that applies. Last night I tried to sleep but was awoken by gun fire. There are machine gun ranges here, so it's not out of the ordinary to hear weapons systems doing whatever kind of exercise. Well, they were doing "Talking Guns," a term we use to descibe the cohesion of gun teams to keep a constant stream of suppressing fire on a single target area or kill zone. One gun fires, lets up, and the other fires, lets up, as the other fires again. I heard this, though the weapons were firing abnormally small bursts. Normal bursts are 5-7 rounds, these were more like 3-4. Target's weren't all that visible? Recon by fire? Who knows. Then I heard them go "Cyclic." The fastest rate of fire. That's when you lay on the trigger and pour red-hot lead out the barrel as fast as the machine can cycle ammunition. Understand that some of these weapons cycle at nearly 1,000 rounds per minute. Then there was nothing else. I guess the guards found some, eh, "camel spiders" to shoot at last night. A report we heard this morning confirmed as much (the details of which I cannot divulge for reasons I hope are obvious). I prayed and went back to sleep. love you all, :D
# posted by chevas @ 7:30 PM 